I want to stick my p in your. b.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Randomize