She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
