Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i already hear my dad disowning me
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
