I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
She bit a glass in half.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
