I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Randomize
