How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
