we have officially lost it.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize