Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
