would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
