This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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