You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
should my penis look like a turkey
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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