Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
