Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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