too bad you live with your parents still
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
