Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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