Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize