He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize