oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
