do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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