She's JV to your varsity
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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