great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
