Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
