He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
