Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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