kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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