if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize