Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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