I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
