On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
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