She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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