Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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