Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
