I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
As shirtless as possible
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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