i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Dick very happy bro
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
