i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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