I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize