It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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