Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
