Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
