Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
My balls are so social today.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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