The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
