try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
