420 ftw
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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