i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize