Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
