I don't think brook has ever known best
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
