U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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