she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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