Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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