I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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