we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
