Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
